advice? girl of my dreams...

[lucke]

... is "seeing this guy", as she puts it. she says that its not serious, but she's not on the market, whatever that means. she knows i like her, but she does not know to what extent, yet. we've been seeing a lot of each other lately, and we get along great together. she came right out and said that if she wasn't in the current situation she's in, we would be going out a lot more than just lunch.

this girl is such a cool chick that i haven't even thought about her sexually. we just seem to connect on a whole other level, so i want to stick around just in case, even if that only means that i'll be a friend. is there any chance that i can get her away from the other guy long enough for her to realize that she should be with me? and what can i do to try and get her to go out with me, but not make it seem like a date?

i'm looking for serious advice, because this chick is driving me crazy because i can't get her out of my mind.

thanks

 

[K2]

Sounds like she's in the same situation you're in bro. If she can get the "guy of her dreams" - then she'll settle for you. I can understand that, but still a little whacked when you're laying your heart out on the table. I've been out of the dating scene a little to long to give any good advice but maybe some of the XRU_girls could offer some insight... :dontknow:

 

[XrunDan]

Dude, this is my EXACT story...and i am MARRIED to her. If this is THE girl, it'll happen...If not, it'll hurt, but you will find her man. Besides, if all goes wrong, you still have the X!!!

 

[Bobby B]

this girl is such a cool chick that i haven't even thought about her sexually

Not really sure what to say to that you must be in love or :stupid:

 

[lucke]

Not really sure what to say to that you must be in love or :stupid:

thats what i'm afraid of... well not really afraid, but not wanting to get too far into it and screw things up.:hmmmm2:

 

[Bobby B]

thats what i'm afraid of... well not really afraid, but not wanting to get too far into it and screw things up.:hmmmm2:

Just be yourself and go with the flow

 

[lenie03]

maybe some of the XRU_girls could offer some insight... :dontknow:

I don't know what to say about this one, I mean my guy's in Iraq. But maybe if she's into truck/car maybe try taking her to a show and walk and talk with her all day long. Just you and her:dontknow:

 

[lucke]

I don't know what to say about this one, I mean my guy's in Iraq. But maybe if she's into truck/car maybe try taking her to a show and walk and talk with her all day long. Just you and her:dontknow:

thought of that, she just doesn't care about cars/trucks... they're only transportation to her, which is good if we end up together... no more money being spent on an additional car

 

[project-c2]

Nothing wrong with being friends. You never know. "SEEING each other..." is not the same as DATING. IMO. Just be friends, maybe she will realize that the guy she is seeing is a total ass and you will be there to catch her.

 

[XRunninTaco]

... my advice is ... if she wishes to see you more than lunch ... then go ahead and ask her out ... if there is another guy ... who really cares ... she isnt gonna be waiting for someone to sweep her off her feet ... i say go ahead ask her out ... and if you worry about the other guy ... who cares bro ... have you ever heard the saying "nice guys finish last" im sure you have ... just step up your game ... :top:

but hey ... what do i know ... im only 18 :laugh:

 

[lenie03]

Nothing wrong with being friends. You never know. "SEEING each other..." is not the same as DATING. IMO. Just be friends, maybe she will realize that the guy she is seeing is a total ass and you will be there to catch her.

As a girl I would say be careful with that one because I know me and if I leave one bf the next is a rebound guy. Just someone to fill in the gaps in between bf's. So I'd try not to become that rebound guy, but if she leave him for you then it's different. I don't know how much since that made, but yeah anyhow. good luck.

 

[lucke]

Brian ... do you listen to 97.1 FM at 3 in the afternoons ... 2 words ... Tom Leykis ...

but anywho ... my advice is ... if she wishes to see you more than lunch ... then go ahead and ask her out ... if there is another guy ... who really cares ... she isnt gonna be waiting for someone to sweep her off her feet ... i say go ahead ask her out ... and if you worry about the other guy ... who cares bro ... have you ever heard the saying "nice guys finish last" im sure you have ... just step up your game ... :top:

but hey ... what do i know ... im only 18 :laugh:

Leykis101 won't help this situation... he knows jack about real relationships, and i'm not looking to just get laid.

As a girl I would say be careful with that one because I know me and if I leave one bf the next is a rebound guy. Just someone to fill in the gaps in between bf's. So I'd try not to become that rebound guy, but if she leave him for you then it's different. I don't know how much since that made, but yeah anyhow. good luck.

makes perfect sense to me, but then again, that was my original thoughts anyways.

 

[azjimi]

Just be yourself and go with the flow

Simple but excellent advice. Almost any other thing you do will end up a disaster.

 

[lucke]

Simple but excellent advice. Almost any other thing you do will end up a disaster.

i agree, but i'm nothing but myself around her, and she respects that. she knows i'm shy, but have opened way up when i'm with her.

my biggest concern/question is, how can i take her out if she's "seeing" someone already?

 

[XRunninTaco]

Leykis101 won't help this situation... he knows jack about real relationships, and i'm not looking to just get laid.

Lmao ... that never crossed my mind ... but i wasnt implying that ... i know he dont know jack about relationships ... but he always says one thing "if you say you like her and you let someone take her ... it means that you didnt have what it takes to seal the deal" what im sayin is just go for you what you want ... you can never go wrong with that :top:


again sorry if my original post sounded like just to get laid ... i didnt mean it to come out that way ... im goin to edit it right now :laugh:

 

[RedXRunner]

thats what i'm afraid of... well not really afraid, but not wanting to get too far into it and screw things up.:hmmmm2:

i understand you..you dont wanna see her sexually to not screw up the friendship or whatever yall have... ask her to lunch or something.

 

[project-c2]

thought of that, she just doesn't care about cars/trucks... they're only transportation to her, which is good if we end up together... no more money being spent on an additional car

But another problem I ran into is the "... Why do you waste so much money on your truck?":rolleyez: Not now though. I found a girl. I'm just saying.

 

[XDsm]

Make it clear that you like her don't just be a "friend" tell her how you feel. If you display yourself as just a friend she will associate you with a friend relationship and not deeper. You will be the guy friend she has until she finds a BF. Let her know that you do like her and would like to have a deeper relationship. If you are too passive then you might miss out. Setup a date besides lunch. Take her for an evening out and just be yourself. Show her you have interest in a relationship with her. Take the initiative and be bold. Girls like a man with confidence.

 

[lucke]

i understand you..you dont wanna see her sexually to not screw up the friendship or whatever yall have... ask her to lunch or something.

thats not it, there are other female friends of mine that i've had many dreams and fantasies about... but when i've dreamt of this girl, my sub conscience completely skips over the hanky panky. i've never even had a thought of "man, i wonder what she's like in bed?"

i do go to lunch with her quite often, and i talk to her at work all the time as well.

 

[XDsm]

i do go to lunch with her quite often, and i talk to her at work all the time as well.

You need to take it to the next step. Show her that you are interested. What is she interested in? If you guys listen to the same music see if a band is playing locally soon and ask her to go see the show with you.

I'm wondering when she says she's seeing this guy if she really is in a relationship. Maybe she just got out of a relationship:dontknow: